a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
