I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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