: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
