hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
