bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
