do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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