oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
