I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
