ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize