I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Randomize
