White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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