her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
