so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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