Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
