I looked at my own cervix.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
