I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
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