Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
