Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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