Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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