just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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