what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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