Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
