Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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