New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize