margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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