I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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