i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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