Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
