Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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