You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
