Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
