Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
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