i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize