Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
