11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Randomize
