What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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