let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
