bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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