I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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