i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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