He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Randomize
