garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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