I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
