Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
