No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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