kristin has been a bad kristin
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize