Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
