i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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