Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
