Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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