1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
